


The one where Ezio meets Leo

by orphan_account



Series: Stupid College AU [5]
Category: Assassin's Creed
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-31
Updated: 2013-03-31
Packaged: 2017-12-07 00:55:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/742212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leo gets stuck in a tree, and Ezio has the serendipity to walk by.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The one where Ezio meets Leo

**Author's Note:**

> Word count: 1392  
> Rating: G  
> Characters: Ezio, Leonardo  
> Warnings: As with everything in this AU, 90% of this is crack and 0% of it is meant to be taken seriously.  
> Notes: Tree puns ahoy! Ezio is an RA so he gets to be in the dorm a few weeks before the semester starts.

The date had been a disaster. She had spent the entire evening prattling on about how she had  _been_ to Italy once and the shopping was great and she had gotten this designer bag there, and, about an hour into dinner, even Ezio Auditore wasn’t willing to go through all the bullshit to sleep with this girl, pretty as she was. He had standards, and she was  _vapid._

He had, however, slept with her anyway, because he was Ezio Auditore.

Still, he hadn’t driven his car and he didn’t want to interact with her any more, so he was walking the mile back to his dorm.

At 3 AM.

He was walking through the tree-lined path that cut behind the student center, when he heard a voice.

“Here, up here! Can you help me?”

He almost walked on, sure that the voice was talking to someone else…but there wasn’t anyone else around, so he stopped, and looked around for the source, still not seeing anyone.

“In the tree,” the voice said again, sounding vaguely humiliated.

Ezio looked up, and found a humanoid shape midst the shadowy leaves and, a few trees away, what appeared to be…a hang glider.

But he focused on the man.

“Are you stuck?” he called up to him.

“Yes…Do you think you could help me down?”

“Of course I will,” Ezio said amiably. “But once I do, I would like to hear the story of how you got up there.”

There was a moment of silence. Then, “That sounds fair. I’ve been up here for three hours. I thought I’d be here all night.”

Ezio was already jumping into the lower branches of the tree. “Well, if you were enjoying your time, I can always  _leaf_ you there.”

“I’d really rather you didn’t,” the voice said weakly.

“Well, do not worry, my friend. I will help you, though I am  _stumped_ as to how you got up there.”

There was another silence. Then, “Well, you are certainly going out on a  _limb_ for me, so I thank you.”

Ezio smiled, and jumped up to a higher branch, almost high enough to help the man. “Oh, that was a good one! You are  _branching_ out!”

He was close enough to see him smirk in the shadows, a blond man in a purple button-down shirt. One more branch and— “Ah, I can see the  _root_ of your problem, now.” The man smiled.

“Yes,” he said, “The ties from my hang glider are caught in the branches and they’re too far for me too reach.”

Ezio maneuvered over so that he felt balanced safely, and worked at the knots, but somehow, they were irrevocably tangled.

“Can I cut the cords?” Ezio asked.

The man nodded, and Ezio fished out his keys, with the folding knife attached to the ring. A bit of sawing, and the ties all snapped, freeing the stranger, who was (thankfully) securely wedged into the tree.

“Let’s get you down, my friend,” Ezio said, helping the man onto his feet. He seemed shaky, and unsteadily grabbed onto a nearby limb.

“I am going to fall,” he said a moment later, and Ezio grimaced.

“You’ll be fine; only follow my lead.” He directed the man down to a lower limb, steadying him when he began to lose his balance, and slowly, they both managed to get to the lowest-hanging branch, which was only a short hop down to the ground. Ezio managed it gracefully, ending with a flourish for show.

The stranger fell and landed on his ass. Ezio didn’t laugh, but it was a very near thing.

“Are you alright?” He asked, extending his hand.

“I am now, thanks to you. I never thought being on the ground would be so comforting,” he said.

Ezio nodded, helping the man up. He brushed himself off, looked up at the trapped hang-glider, and shook his head, as if to say that there was no point to bothering with it.

“I never caught your name,” The stranger said.

“I never offered it,” Ezio replied. “I am Ezio Auditore.”

“I am—“ he hesitated. “Call me Leo.”

They shook hands properly, and Ezio smiled winningly. “It’s a pleasure, Leo. Unless I am mistaken, you are also from Italia?”

Even in the dark, Ezio could see Leo’s eyes light up, and their conversation switched to Italian as they, by unspoken decision, began walking.

“I do want to hear your story,” Ezio said, gesturing at the trees that lined the path.

Leo started. “Yes, that. I should preface it by saying that I’m a professor here, not a student.”

“Ah! You’re very young for a professor,” Ezio commented.

Leo shrugged. “I got my doctorate when I was 25. Anyway, I designed two courses this semester and finally got them approved to be taught.”

“What are they?” Ezio asked.

“Art for Engineering Majors, and Engineering for Art Majors.”

“An interesting contrast,” Ezio said, feeling vaguely out of his depth.

“The important part is that they are taught one right after the other, and the first is in the art building, and the second in the physics and engineering building,” Leo said darkly.

Ezio raised his eyebrows. “Those are on opposite sides of the campus. There’s no way you would get there on time,” he said.

“That’s exactly what I told my department head, but he told me, and I quote, ‘Leonardo, you had better find a way! I’m already going out on a limb by letting you teach these ridiculous courses, so just be there; I don’t care how! Fly if you have to!”

There was a silence. Finally, Ezio filled in, “And you took that as a challenge?”

Leo shrugged again. “Well, the whole campus is built on a hill, and the art building is at the very top of it. I thought it might be possible to go to the roof of the building and…hang-glide down to the engineering building. I wanted to get some practice in before classes started though, when no one would be around. Turns out that hang-gliding is harder than it looks.”

“It is a good thing you didn’t break your neck,” Ezio said, thinking of what might have happened if he had missed the tree and crashed into a building instead.

“I should take lessons,” Leo agreed amiably. That…wasn’t what Ezio’s point had been, but he didn’t feel the need to press the issue. Besides, it was something he could help with, and Ezio found himself warming toward this eccentric young professor.

“Well, my friend, guess who has two thumbs and a few years of hang-gliding experience,” he said cheerfully.

“You?” Leo said disbelievingly.

Ezio mocked hurt. “You doubt me?”

Leo gave him a look. “The stranger who walks by my tree at three in the morning just so happens to be from my home country, able to climb trees like a monkey, and can hang-glide on top of that? Is there anything you can’t do?”

Ezio stopped and paused for a moment, pantomiming the actions of one who was thinking  _very hard._ Finally, he said, “Well, humility is not my strong suit.”

Leo laughed, and said, “Well, if you don’t mind teaching me a few things, I would like to learn to hang-glide without killing myself. That’ll show Dr. Burkholder.”

Ezio smiled, and realized that they had walked almost all the way back to his dorm. “Let me give you my number, and we can work out a time, okay?” He offered.

Leo, nodded, and programmed the number into his cell phone as Ezio listed it off.

A little more walking and Ezio’s building was in sight. “This is where I must leave you, I’m afraid,” he said, mocking a dramatic bow.

Leo nodded and waved him a goodbye. “And Ezio?” He said, making him stop and turn back to face the professor. “Thank you for all your help—you did not need to do all that, let alone offer to do more. It was very kind.”

Ezio smiled and shrugged, touched by such honest thanks. “I am happy to help,” he said, then smirked, the scar across his lips pulling a bit. “And besides—what can I say? I’m a  _sap._ ”  


End file.
